I posed clothed for a drawing class today. The interesting thing about modeling is that in a way you don’t have to do anything or be there. You are supposed to try to be an assortment of shapes, colors, textures and lines; an object. Not a living identity. Just like an object, you don’t respond to other people’s glances, eye contact, or their conversations amongst each other. You just pretend you are not there. I enjoyed being an object, (partly because I’ve never been one) although I wasn’t fully an object because I had clothes on which I felt gave me an identity and a personality. (Next session will be nude). Amongst other factors clothes are a mediating barrier between you and the physical world. Without clothes your body can’t alter the viewer’s perceptions of WHAT you are, and they can make many false judgments about you; you are WHAT you are in a purely physical natural sense. One person in the drawing session left early and said bye to me. I didn’t respond. I felt a little urge to respond but that would mean breaking character, so I didn’t. The most beautiful thing about being an object is that you remain a person but you can allow yourself to not do anything. You can just not speak or laugh or frown at other’s conversations etc. because doing so would make viewers realize that you are human and would change their perceptions of what they are drawing and realize they are starring at a live person. And you can sense what it is like to be an object that others look at and use. In other social situations it’s hard to not do anything or not respond to other people because it would be socially awkward. Modeling for art is about trying to not be there, trying to escape, while leaving your physical body behind—an impossible feat.